G-Game Face!

Hey... remember this? That one feature we used to do? Where you had to highlight the spoilers to see them? Well, here's another one of these articles! This week we explore a genre that has been near my heart for several months now: Farming Games.

Yes, it's Youda Farmer! You know, it's sad, it took me a while to actually understand what the fuck that title was about.

SPOILER ALERT: It's You-da Farmer, you are the farmer. I guess it's supposed to be urban.

I played this game for several hours, and I have to say, it really gets to the core of farming:

Buying shit! Yeah, apparently this world runs on "Credits" like so many future-space societies, and video games. The shop lady in the corner there is a total Minx, by the way. She offers several different buyables for your farm, including a butter churn and weathercock.

SPOILER ALERT: To get the golden butter churn you have to wait until the 5th full moon, then make a blood sacrifice to the spirits of the soil. The next day the new churn will be where the old one was, only it's covered in blood.

As for the plot, it's pretty clear from the map. You are a farmer working for a medieval type town. Every once in a while, the raiders come and you have to pack everything you can behind the little city wall there. It's a fairly interesting way of keeping the game fresh, as you have to often choose between things that seem equally valuable.

SPOILER ALERT: The pro's tell me that the best thing to leave to the raiders is children. The boys usually grow strong backs, perfect for raider labor, and daughters... well, you know. They were different times, man... different times...

Another interesting deviation from the normal farm game is the inclusion of several mini-games. From butter churning (alternate the up and down arrows for several hours) to barn raising, even the most mundane task is made lively and engaging!

SPOILER ALERT: This is one party you DON'T want to get invited to...

Overall, this is a game that's a worthy distraction for the price. You get to run around, spreading joy and water to various crops and livestock. You can shoot raiders with flaming arrows, and you're character pretty much isn't afraid of anything. I wouldn't be ashamed to give it a B+, especially considering your ability to pimp your ride:

SPOILER ALERT: Oh SNAP, son! That ride is CHERRY!

Phuck photoshop phridayz, it's google gearch gaturdayz golume 1

To compete with the ever popular something awful weekly article Photoshop Phridays, we here at Laff and a Haff have decided to start our own weekly article. We both look up something we like in google image search and find what best describes that topic.

First we have Shane's/Heartburn's pick comics














4:49 AM - [PALS] Heart Burn: SO, if you had to (and Im gonna say you do) how would you describe what we're seeing in one word?
4:49 AM - [PALS] Heart Burn: I would say... Unsettling
4:49 AM - [PALS] Laird Spooky Úlfhéðinn: I'd say sodomy
4:50 AM - [PALS] Heart Burn: Judging by the first panel, you might not be far off
4:50 AM - [PALS] Heart Burn: what the hell is that Troll doing?
4:50 AM - [PALS] Heart Burn: Or... what did he just get done doing?
4:51 AM - [PALS] Laird Spooky Úlfhéðinn: I dunno, PKing? I would guess it means player killing, but that's stupid...I imagine it being penis kissing or something more homoerotic WoW players would shun in game but then invite their friends over to do
4:51 AM - [PALS] Heart Burn: I dont know, I've never played WoW
4:51 AM - [PALS] Heart Burn: I only play cool games, like Dungeons and Dragons Online: Stormreach
4:53 AM - [PALS] Laird Spooky Úlfhéðinn: Where peoepl don't quote chuck norris every five minutes
4:53 AM - [PALS] Laird Spooky Úlfhéðinn: sorry had to cut that thought back
4:53 AM - [PALS] Laird Spooky Úlfhéðinn: My favorite part is the word Bullshit
4:53 AM - [PALS] Laird Spooky Úlfhéðinn: he's saying it to a bull
4:54 AM - [PALS] Heart Burn: My favorite part are the Orc warrior's ceremonial hot-pants
4:54 AM - [PALS] Laird Spooky Úlfhéðinn: The only thing I think is missing is a 12 year old alliance figuring out ways to get around the language filter, like dix and puzzie
4:55 AM - [PALS] Heart Burn: Ok, final tally
4:55 AM - [PALS] Heart Burn: Japanese?
4:55 AM - [PALS] Heart Burn: Yes or no.
4:55 AM - [PALS] Laird Spooky Úlfhéðinn: Hai Amerikan-san
4:55 AM - [PALS] Laird Spooky Úlfhéðinn: the creatures of another land shoot characters out of them from another land
4:56 AM - [PALS] Heart Burn: Im still waiting for the upskirt.

Second, My pick (Kurtis/Spooky's) , Punk



















5:01 AM - [PALS] Laird Spooky Úlfhéðinn: When one thinks of punk, what do they think? 1977? The sex pistols? Ramones? Safety pins? Shitty people? If they think the last one I think they're correct
5:01 AM - [PALS] Heart Burn: Hell, when I think "Sex Pistols" I cant help but think "Shitty People"
5:02 AM - [PALS] Laird Spooky Úlfhéðinn: I know after I said that I realized they were on in the same, but thankfully we don't have to deal with them much anymore, you know with the more obnoxious one being dead. But what we do have to deal with is this Disney pop princess
5:02 AM - [PALS] Heart Burn: Some Disney princess, I don't see a crown
5:03 AM - [PALS] Heart Burn: or thousands upon thousands of poorly drawn pornographic images.
5:04 AM - [PALS] Laird Spooky Úlfhéðinn: Punx don't wear crowns! that's a sign of the queen and god save her, poser. Also that reference is creepy stop looking at disney prons.
5:04 AM - [PALS] Heart Burn: Sorry, I wasn't paying attention, I was too busy looking at disney pronz
5:04 AM - [PALS] Heart Burn: Who the hell is Hillary Puff?
5:05 AM - [PALS] Laird Spooky Úlfhéðinn: You know I don't know anything about her other than her name is Hilary DUFF, she was on Disney and when I was in high school my friend said "For a blond chick that Hilary Duff is kind of hot" I had to ask him who the fuck she was. Was she in that show with Shila La "I'm a shitty actor" Bouf?
5:06 AM - [PALS] Heart Burn: Wasn't he a transformer?
5:06 AM - [PALS] Heart Burn: Fumblor?
5:06 AM - [PALS] Heart Burn: He transformed into a broken microwave or something...
5:06 AM - [PALS] Heart Burn: maybe I dreamed that.
5:07 AM - [PALS] Laird Spooky Úlfhéðinn: You're close
5:07 AM - [PALS] Laird Spooky Úlfhéðinn: He was Fagatron, he was a shitty actor that turned in to a shitty dildo
5:08 AM - [PALS] Heart Burn: Well, I do have one positive thing to say about this image.
5:08 AM - [PALS] Heart Burn: It's closer to an up skirt than the last one
5:08 AM - [PALS] Laird Spooky Úlfhéðinn: She's also closer to a 12 year old playing alliance than is legally comfortable for both of us in this image
5:09 AM - [PALS] Heart Burn: Look, I'm not saying it's an upskirt I'm dying to see
5:09 AM - [PALS] Heart Burn: I'm just saying it's closer than an orc in hotpants.
5:09 AM - [PALS] Heart Burn: Wait... this is a girl?
5:09 AM - [PALS] Heart Burn: I thought it was a dude with long hair and a kilt.
5:10 AM - [PALS] Laird Spooky Úlfhéðinn: No wonder you mentioned an upskirt shot
5:10 AM - [PALS] Laird Spooky Úlfhéðinn: Verdict of images:
5:11 AM - [PALS] Heart Burn: Both disappointing and heartbreaking
5:11 AM - [PALS] Laird Spooky Úlfhéðinn: I hate the internet and want to headbutt my own groin
5:11 AM - [PALS] Laird Spooky Úlfhéðinn: Tune in next week for more of your favorite images