Update Time!

Fuck this season!

making soup with the blood of the christian born?

I'm Santa Claus, not fucking Dracula

I saw this movie sitting on the movie shelf at Hollywood video year ago and thought it looked like utter bullshit. Back on Thanksgiving I found it ON-Demand and decided I would watch it with my lady friend, I loved it. I just got done watching it with my family. Aside from Silent night deadly night it's one of my favorite Christmas horror movies. It is...wow, I dunno how to describe it, it's bad but enjoyable, they know it was terrible and they did a good job of balancing 80's style horror and comedy. Santa's slay was down right surprising and enjoyable.

Goldberg is such a bad actor and wrestler but he was so awesome in this movie. The opening scene set the tone for the whole movie, goofy but fun. No matter how bad this movie is I love it, I love it with all of my Christmas spirit. Plus Dave Thomas (Doug Makenzie) was an awesome dirty ol'priest.

If you have Comcast WATCH THIS MOVIE TOMORROW (Christmas), if you don't find a copy before the new year.

Merry Christmas

I've been pretty busy recently with Christmas shit, TF2 and FFXI. But I wish you all a very Merry Christmas, tomorrow. If I missed any ones holidays because of a late post then I wish you a late holiday.

From the veil of sleep

So last night, as Im drifting off to dreamland, I start thinking of Jeff Goldblum. I know, that's pretty common. But I was wondering what it would be like if he had is own magazine. So today I made these:

Did You Know?

Last Wednesday was our 1 year anniversary?

It's True!

Ok so probably old news,

but Predator is finally getting a sequel. No not another Alien vs Predator movie, but a god honest Predator sequel name Predators. It was rumored to be a reboot, but producer Robert Rodriguez has stated that it's a squeal, maybe ignoring the second movie, but is for sure a sequel. While ignoring the second movie would kind of bum me out, as I think it's very much underrated, I don't think it would matter. I mean was there a connection between the first and second movie aside from the Predators? For years, long before AvP, I've been saying how hard I wanted third Predator movie. Finally it's happening and one of the best things to hear about the movie is that, the studio wanted the new Predators to look more like the original Predators, not the AvP ones. While I've liked the original designs, none of them have been as iconic as the original two. Also having Rodriguez produce/write it is great because he's long been a Predator fan and even wrote a script up for the a thid movie back in 1994! So this is something he's been wanting to do for awhile. I have high hopes for this one, I really hope it's not a crap fest. But for sure I'll be there opening day...early July 2010. Which is much closer than I could ever hope for. Now lets hope for some more good new for 2011 Robocop and I'll be the happiest little boy ever.

More Freakazoid

Becasue it's Tuesday, and I have nothing else for you people!

Happy Thanksgiving

I hope you all enjoy great food, strong drinks and time with your family, or friends or yourself if you love yourself more than them. Me, I'll be eating a shit ton of scalped potatoes and drinking with my family till I'm merrily drunk. Sadly no one uploaded the College University Thanksgiving special to youtube, of course it's on their page but sadly you'll have to follow a link. But it's worth it, I swear, a Gamorean Guard stars as John Madden.
HAPPY THANKSGIVING YOU WHITE MAN BASTARDS

Tuesday Night Freakazoid!

Hello, I'm Jack Valenti and these are my cheeks:

I dont think these guys even HAVE music videos

Not ones that they make, at least.

Anyway, here's some Mr. Bungle because I still like them:








I admit, I came for the zany covers, and stayed because I actually liked this fucked up band. Godspeed, you bastards.

Movie Review: 2012

Two things happened in this movie:

1) Someone Cried

2) Something Broke

Take that, alternate a few times, and you got this movie.

It was agreed that the movie suffered for a lack of Jeff Goldblum. However, Danny Glover made a DAMN fine president. I've once heard this man declare that someone had "Cut off his dick and shoved it up his ass". Hell yeah.

Not a GOOD movie, but a FUN movie.

GAME FACE!?!?

Game Face.

Today, we take a look at a little ADVENTURE game:



Fairy Tales: Three Heroes

The story, as you could probably guess, revolves around 3 heroes. I'd like to review each one individually (if I may).



Randolf the Stickman

Randolf was probably my least favorite character. His character is supposed to be some sort of Monk, but Im pretty sure most branches of every church I know consider a moustache of that caliber a mortal sin. Not to mention his cumpulsive gambling, and CONSTANT titty jokes.

SPOILER ALERT: Don't get me wrong, the jokes are HILARIOUS

His function in the overall story is to provide much needed information on many of the monsters. For example- He's the only one who knows that the Hydra can only be killed by a tincture of sulfer blessed by a virgin maiden.

SPOILER ALERT: I guess I should have spoilered the hydra's weakness. The werewolf clowns are especially weak to- you know those fake guns? The ones that shoot out a little flag that says "BANG"? Its those, except the flag says "SILVER"



This dude, as I said, was my least favorite character as a character. Don't get me wrong, the game would be ALOT harder without his tips, so I'll give him a B+



The Blonde Bowman

This douchebag is probably even worse than the last one. I know, I know I said that Randolf was my least favorite, but man... MAN. The Blonde Bowman will NOT stop screaming in his little whiny voice of his! He sounds like Hayden Christianson being punched in the balls while punching ME in the balls.

SPOILER ALERT: The worst part is his laughter. Its not even what you think... he talks like a screeching banshie on PCP, but he laughs like a fucking ghoul. Its the most demonic thing I've ever heard in my short life *shudder*

I admit, I dont have many pictures of this guy. Every time I was forced to play as him, I forgot to press the screen cap button. His function ingame is to provide cover fire for the other guys. This mechanic is a bit... wonky. He always hits SOMETHING, is the thing. Even when he misses, something usually teleports into his arrows, but not normal stuff like enemies. Its all grandfather clocks, bowls of pork or crates full of hand grenades.

SPOILER ALERT: Hand grenades arent even IN this game. Well, at least, not until the final boss fight against the Narrator/Evil Wizard/Robot

Seriously, this guy can go fuck himself. B+



Olaf Beefsteak

Oh

Man

This dude is BOSS! Seriously, makes the WHOLE GAME worth playing. He's a two ton mass of ass-kicking muscles (IE, every one of his two tons of muscles kicks some form of ass, figuratively and literaly). He has the most powerful attacks, the best defense and the heartiest laugh/beard.

SPOILER ALERT: Near the end of the game his beard actually REPLACES the other two characters, thank GOD



His function ingame is to be the character you wish the game was about exclusively. He has the double duty of beating all the bad guys and making the other two characters look stupid. My favorite moment is when he turns to the Bowman and tells him that arrows are for sissies, and proves it by sticking one through his eye, all the way through his head and out the other side only to laugh it off and take no damage.

SPOILER ALERT: Ironically, Olaf is ultimate killed by an arrow through the head after the end credits.

What can I say? He's the greatest character in this, or any other game (at least that I've played). His dialogue is short and sweet, his controls are fluid and intuitive and his beard is mighty.

What more could you want? B+!



Overall, this game was pretty ok. The good was offset by alot of bad. But the good was so good that it balanced out in the end. If you like swords, sourcery, sandwiches and scotch, this is a game you should definately try. B+

SPOILER ALERT: Look for a random cameo by Fire Man from the Mega Man series. He might be hard to spot- HINT: Look under the princess' skirt. Happy Hunting!

My dream project...

would be a comedy/horror movie staring Christopher Walken and Lance Henriksen. Walken would star as an optimistic widower who has lost his direction in life. Henriksen would play his cynical best friend who never married or had children. He reminds Walken of their childhood dream of owning a farm together and eventually presuades Walken to move with him to the Pacific Northwest to live their dream. Eventhing starts off quiet and nice as they begin to enjoy their new life, Henriksen even finding a sort of love interest. But everything begins to tumble down as their crops are found torn up and some of their live stock missing or mutilated. They decide to stake out to find out who is causing them problems and they witness a large hairy creature they can only deduce is Sasquatch. Comedy ensues as they try to capture the fabled Sasquatch. Movie hit the sequal stars them and aliens invading their farm.

Where's the update?

I should have gotten the photos from Halloween up by now but I've been waiting for my girlfriend to get her photos uploaded too so I can post them all at once. But there's been a lot of stuff going on with her and her camera so no uploading yet. Hopefully soon! Also I have a wicked hang over so I probably wont be doing it today.

This is a cross-post

From Craig (AKA Witty Banter):

We enjoyed some wrestling.



Kurt won a costume contest! He got 4 free tickets to the next show (12/12/09)! Who's game to go!?

Ruining Stuff Kurt Likes- Part 1

Today's topic: RoboCop

Happy uh Halloween??

Yeah it's late. I spent all of Friday night working o my costume, say six or seven hours and then finished it up yesterday morning before carving pumpkins and heading out until 3 this morning. So I've been a little busy. When my camrea is done charging I'll post photos and a video or two of last night! Stay tuned and until then here's this late Halloween treat.

Charlie Brown is a asshole!

Woowee, it's been a long time since a good original Halloween themed movie came out. My girlfriend and I wanted to see this one out of curiosity based souly on a commercial. We hadn't heard anything about it or seen anything else. After watching it I did some research. It was released this year but filmed and was originally supposed to be released in 2007. WB for a reason that has not been explained pulled the movie from a theatrical release and released it to DVD this year. Rumor has it they didn't want it compete with SAW IV. Trick r' Treat is one of the most fresh Halloween movies I've seen in a long time. I loved it, it has everything a good Halloween movie should, zombies, werewolves, vampires, Halloween demons, and a murderer.

It takes much insperation from the old horror magazines/comis like Creepy or Tales from the crypt. It's a series of small stories that take place on Halloween. But what's neat is that they're all linked in some way, some small as seeing the characters from one story in the background to characters being in several stories. It also doesn't follow a set time line and jumps around a little but it doesn't take away from the film. Also there's no straight CG, the movie is like a classic horror movie with make up and animitronics. There is a little bit of CG, but it's used tastfully and doesn't ruin the movie.
I don't have any scenes I can show, I also wouldn't want to post much of the movie because I wouldn't want to ruin it! I cannot stress how much I love this movie. I watched it twice in a week, once with Sara and again for our horror movie marathon. If you can go out and rent/buy a copy and watch it Friday night or even on Halloween night and you wont be disappointed. There is a small list of movies I watch every year around Halloween and this one has been added to it, damn near the top too. WB really fucked up not releasing this one in theaters. But that's ok they already announced a second one! So hopefully that one will have a theatrical release.

Here is a classic Halloween tune

This is a Halloween tradition

Like the great Pumpkin Charlie Brown or Nosferatu, have to watch this every year.


There's a better quality version here, http://www.collegeuniv.com/html/module-Pagesetter-viewpub-tid-1-pid-19.html.

Some music for your enjoyment.

So there's this video that we like, you may have seen it. It has the mario brothers and bowser and- you know what? It's this one:



So that band, right? Turns out they didnt just make one song and go away. This was news to me, but it also made me glad to see that they've also done some Mega Man songs. Here's some that Kurt and I liked.



First, here's one that's kind of serious. I mean, as serious as a song about a sad robot from a video game can be. In it we see a very sympathetic Bubbleman, longing to be free from his watery prison, yearning for companionship.



Here's a sillier one. A very gay Crashman sings about his lust for blue robotic men. This one got a few hearty chuckles from me.



Probably one of the best, in terms of both music and humor. Its no secret that Im a big fan of the music in the Megaman series. I'll admit, Heatman has never been a go-to favorite of mine, but this version really kicks it out of the park.




BONUS VIDEO: Not by the same group, I just fuckin love it and Hyadain dosen't have an Airman that we can find.

I worked on this for five or six hours tonight

The last week or so has been pretty hectic, we lost a close family friend, her funeral is tomorrow. I've also been kind of ill, so I haven't had a lot of "up" time aside from work. I've been getting exhausted really quick. With that said I'm way behind on my costume and because of that I'm building it with what I have around and as cheap as I can. I'm pretty pleased with it so far, this is just the first coat of spray paint, I'll be putting another coat on by hand as to not damage the foam anymore.



































I'm about 80% done with the gun, I have to add the barrel with the barrel ring, trigger, wire, the two canister type parts to the front and a bracket to attach it to my pack. As far as my pack goes I'm about 10% done....I'm hoping to get most of it hammered out on Sunday.

As far as the actual uniform goes, I'm all done minus a walkie talkie and a safegard, but I'm pleased with where I'm at. Here is a "preview" haha

I HATE a guy with a car and no sense of humor.

Here's a good one, a classic. For as long as I remember the theme song of this movie has haunted the rooms of my house every October. It's always been one of my dad's favorite movies. Sadly none of it's sequels have been able to capture the essence of the original, though the remake a couple of years ago was alright. It's not Halloween until you've watched Halloween.

Every October I have to watch this and two other movies for it to really feel like Halloween. Mike Myers is such a creepy slasher villain and for such a small budgeted film it's amazing work. It's better than most horror movies in the last couple of decades. John Carpenter really hit the ball out of the park with this one.

You wouldn't believe how hard it is to find good scenes of the original on youtube. But I have good news, AMC is showing Halloween on the 26th and 27th, 10pm and 6pm respectively. I'm not sure if that's Pacific or Eastern or what. If you haven't watched it this year mark your calender, Halloween is just around the corner.

Ok, as promised

here are the images from out ghost hunt from the beginning of the month.

We went down to a old graveyard which runs along the old highway. While we don't believe graveyards house the most activity, mainly because they're not the sites where people have died, they are fun to visit and check out once and awhile.
















Here is a image of some "activity" lots of little orbs, which are often thought of as some sort of paranormal activity but they're just dust particles, so nothing here.

















This is just a spooky image I took, again nothing. These next two are the two I want people to see.
































I always take pictures at chest level so I can see what I'm shooting with my eyes and then check what I catch on my camera. I didn't see this when I took the photos but when I checked them there were these odd puffs of "smoke". We think we figured out what it is. What does everyone else think it is??

As goofy and as bad as this song is...

it's not Halloween without it.

Oh captain, my captain

Captain Lou Albano 1933-2009

He's dancing with the angels now.

...I'm supposed to read you your rights. But you're in *Mooney's* jail, and in Mooney's jail you ain't *got* no rights!

Here's a classic that I had to go back and watch yesterday since I hadn't in years. It's currently on comcast on demand if you have that for free. It's a fun, goofy, stupid movie with awesome costuming. Not many movies from the era have as good of monsters costumes as this one does, or at least in my opinion. It also has a awesome original soundtrack for a horror movie. The music is menacing and goofy at the same time. Killer Klowns from outer space in my opinion is the best movie about killer clowns from space, albeit the only one I know of.

When I was a child I refused to watch this one...I was afraid of menacing clowns like It and aliens...I saw too many Unsolves Mysteries when I was a child along with the cattle mutilations that happened around my grandma's and the crop cirlces on my dad's friends property. Those two things just weren't my cup. Now that I'm a man and fear nothing except dolls, I thoroughly enjoy this one now.

This is a good scene though I don't think this movie lacks any good scenes. Either way Curtis Mooney deserved to die for spelling his name with a C and being a bastard.

This one is a pretty easy to find movie, Sci Fi in the past use to show it often and it's free to watch on demand now so you shoudl check it out if you can!

So this one wasn't on the Halloween list but I just had to say something about it.

I just got done watching a Japanese film about being bullied, family and how they grow closer through crisis. While it's not traditionally a Halloween movie I think it's a good one to view to bring the family closer as the holiday season approaches. A high school girl and her brother struggle after their parents are suspected of murder and commit suicide. They're ostracized and outcasts because of their parents.

It's as over the top, absurd and gory as the trailer makes it out to be. I loved every minute of it. It was like a old grind house movie mixed with anime, the good kind like Ninja Scroll and Fist of the North Star. Lots of cartoony disembowelment, decapitations, removal or limbs and torture. It's more graphic than anything I've seen for awhile and I know this would be a turn off for most but it's much much less realistic than the Saw movies that are ever so popular. In those you never see anyones head get skinned by a machine gun and continue to scream and move around!

While I rarely watch movies dubbed I could only get my hands on a dubbed version of this movie. While it usually detracts from the movie I think it fit really well for this one since it was so goofy. Like I said this isn't a horror or "Halloween" movie per say but gore movies tend to show up around Halloween too. So if you want to have a couple laughs, maybe get grossed out and be entertained you should try and find a copy of this somewhere.

Also, Halloween themed music posts for the month

With this gem kicking it off. There hasn't been a Halloween of my life that I haven't heard this song. It's always been one of my families favorites.

Spooooooky

So last night Shane came up and visited for a few hours. Him, our friend Matt, my girlfriend Sara and I went ghost hunting. For three years now it's been a tradition that we go trouncing through parks, graveyards, parking lots and other place that we've heard have activity. A couple of years ago we picked up some interesting noises that would respond to our questions, that was neat. Last year we weren't as lucky. According to Matt we might have picked up one EVP but I've yet to hear it. Well, tonight we didn't get to make it to any of our regular haunts, no pun intended, but we went to a new spot. Nothing special, didn't really feel anything, didn't really see anything. I did pick up some interesting things on my camera that I didn't realize I captured until after we left. Sadly my camera cord is out of commission at the moment. But I ordered another one and I hope to have it with in the week and I'll post the images and see what you guys think.

I watch more movies in the month of October than any other month

One of my favorite things to do in the month of October is watch horror movies. With that I'll be posting many movies I suggest you watch to get ready for All Hallow's eve. This one is one of my favorite werewolf movies, if not my favorite. Some of you may or may not know that werewolves are my favorite horror/folklore/real monster. Truthfully it's been awhile since I've seen this movie but I had watched it many times in a short period. Dog Soldiers is about a group of British soldiers going out on a training mission in teh Scottish Highlands only to come across a outpost inhabited only by guns and live ammo. Perplexed they collect the ammo and make their way to their destination. On the way they start to get chased by werewolves and meet up with a young woman who takes them in to her home for them to whole up in until dawn. This movie has a lot of action, some decent gore, a couple of laughs and awesome fucking werewolves.

This is a scene near the beginning of the movie, I didn't want to post anything that gave too much of the movie away. It would just ruin the surprises.

It's October!

My favorite month and it contains my favorite holiday, HALLOWEEN! So keep an eye out for many Halloween themed updates.

Opinions are like Assholes: Titan Maximum

So, I wanted to start doing a review column, and it's my blog (well, half of it is) so here I go.

Titan Maximum. From the guys who did Robot Chicken, and I assume some other guys too. It's a parody of the Sentai Team/Giant Robot series from some of our childhoods like Voltron. Actually, it's pretty much Voltron with dick jokes.

I have to admit, the opening was pretty promising. We have the enemy fleet approaching a defenseless planet, ready to strike. For a minute, I thought the show might actually be a homage rather than straight up parody.

Sadly, that notion was dashed the second the characters opened their mouths. The main protagonists "banter" back and fourth as they decimate the enemy fighters in a way as to make me cringe. Right away its obvious that they were going for common stereotype characters, only exaggerated heavily. We've got "Moronic Leader Guy" "Sarcastic Smart Guy" "Goody-Two-Shoes Good at everything Girl" "Paris Hilton" and "Fat Comedy Guy". That's pretty much it, no subversion or anything. They're all pretty "in yo face" about their respective persona's pretty much to the point where I decided I didn't really care for the show.

And I guess, at the end of the day, that's what I liked least about the whole thing. The characters were predictable. You could set your watch by them. Nothing that they said caught me off guard and half of what they did I found plain obnoxious (especially Paris Hilton). I get that its a comedy series, I shouldn't be expecting Shakespearean motivations for each and every character. But they kept alluding to this semi-serious back story that didn't fit with how the characters were portrayed.

Second place in the "things I didn't care for" category was the drawn out gags. I don't know if they plan on keeping the show at a half hour per episode, but I'm wondering if that's a good idea... Alot of what I saw felt like padding to me. This could have easily come in at the 11-15 minute mark and would have achieved just as much as far as progression of story.

To be fair, it's not all bad. I did watch the whole premier, because there were some things that had me genuinely laughing. Mostly just little things, short gags etc. But the overall setting/plot also drew me in. They did a fairly good job of presenting a sci-fi giant robot universe. The set pieces were cool, and the effects were good for what they are (claymation and some 3d stuff).

Overall, if almost ALMOST felt like they were going for a more serious series when they originally sketched this idea out, then someone decided it should be a parody part-way through production. Otherwise, they can't decide if they want to appeal to lovers of fart jokes, or people who are nostalgic for giant robots. Honestly, I might give it another chance or two to grab me. There was alot that rubbed me the wrong way, but there was also just enough that I liked that it might be worth another shot.

Arbitrary Number Score:

8 Shrugs- Not entirely sure that I'll watch the series. But I don't REGRET watching this episode. If you like Robot Chicken most of the time, and have fond memories of Voltron and stuff you could give it a shot. It's only about 25 minutes or so... also free.

Inspired by Mr. Banter

Here's a wallpaper I made:

Then I went ahead and did this too:

OH MY FUCKING GOD

Two of my favorite action stars/men appeared in the same movie together!

I want to see this so fucking bad.

On a side note, I informed Shane that I have in fact seen Hell comes to Frogtown at the young tender age of 9. Since I don't remember most of it I'll be rewatching it soon, maybe even this morning if I can't sleep!

Straight bad asses...

or we were


















This a funny and depressing picture, haha. This was Shane and I working at the elementary school we met each other at over four years ago, probably closer to five now. Now we're just lazy old men.

Not much to say,

but that Brad Neely cartoons exist uncut still. These were on a website run by William's Street and they shut it down last year and folded a few of the web series in Adult Swim but edited them which sucked. Well, Mr. Brad Neely has uploaded them to youtube.

Nostalgia gets the better of me

Sometimes my friends will talk about their favorite Disney Movie. The one they always watched as a kid. Everybody I know has one. Some popular ones are Lion King, Beauty and the Beast or Aladdin.

I have yet to meet someone else who shares my favorite:




When I was little I watched the HELL out of Sword and the Stone (my parents can attest to this). I even, at one point, had the opportunity to read the novel "The Once and Future King" and guess what: Its not the MOVIE that's totally fucked up, it's the SOURCE MATERIAL.

Oh, the other big one was:



Fuck the hampster dance for stealin that shit.

So, what Disney movies do you like? And don't fuckin' lie, we all have one.

Kurt, do me a favor:

So, Roddy Piper. Wrestler, actor, all around awesome story teller. You've no doubt heard about "They Live" the classic sci-fi role that made Roddy a gum chewing asskicker. But... have you heard of Sam?

Sam Hell that is:



So, Kurt, please fufull your role on this blog and find/watch this movie for me. Thanks in advance,

Shane

Never Forget

Never ever never!

http://tinyurl.com/nl3y34

Always Remember!

As a young child

I was a big wrestling fan! As a family we would watch WWF weekly and have parties for all of the Wrestlemanias. Around the late 90's with the attitude era...we just stopped. Flat out stopped watching wrestling, I for one am glad. I look back on that era with a donkey shit taste in my mouth.
Recently Shane exposed me to some of the current wrestling programs, while not as good as what we grew up watching it's much better than what was around ten years ago or so. With this resugence in wrestling interest I've been watching a lot of the old matches. Like most kids Hulk Hogan was a favorite but one of my all time favorites, even now I love him, was Rowdy Rody Piper. This is one reason why

That and They Live.

I couldn't help myself...mainly because I've been up all night

Anyways, I'm a huge Atom and his package fan. I was lucky enough to see him on his last tour, it was one of the most amazing shows of my life. My friend recently mentioned Math the band to me, I happened to look over their name on a Atom and his package tribute and didn't pay any attention to them. I have most of their stuff now, though I'm not as impressed by as much of it as I would have liked to have been. It seems like their most recent album, the one I don't have is much more refined and better than the stuff I have. They're like Atom and his package and Andrew WK. From the live clips I've seen they seem to be able to put on a damn good show. I would very much like to see them.

Math the Band! from Quarter Productions on Vimeo.

They're also kind of hipsters, but I can look past that.

Return of the tag team article

Here at Laff and a Haff, we like roleplaying games....ALOT.

It's true, in fact, it's half the reason we never post.

That's kind of true! Sadly we rarely get to play any of the games we like....we've become the default DMs for our groups respectively.

Sometimes we let Steve do it, but he always yells at us when we say swears.

And then he swears when we ask him why he can but we can't...

And then he kills our characters...But this article isnt about Steve (fuck that guy)!

Well not really, we love that guy. He's like a creepy uncle that's not our uncle or as creepy.

Also, we have to say we like him, he reads this blog.

Alright I think we've stretched that out as much as we can. Some where along the way to growing up wanting to play fantasy games and actually play fantasy games I stumbled upon the name of this game.

And I just sort of rolled with the sort of crowd who would often talk about it.

I had been looking for it for years, but it was always too god damn expensive because it was always going in and out of print. About a year ago I finally got to play it....kind of. We played for about twenty minutes until one of my friends accidentally spilled his 40 oz on to it.

Which, if I understand the rules of fantasy gaming, only enhances the experience. Like putting on a Led Zeplin album.

Or Rush, which is basically what you and I did when we played this game for the first couple of times.

The game is Talisman by the way. Not sure if we mentioned that.

Oh I mentioned it last night/this morning in the last post so I just assumed they knew.

I didn't read that...

Oh, you should it's a good post. Whoever wrote it, not saying any names, is probably a really handsome man with sexy body parts somewhere on him.

Whatever. What do you think of Talisman?

It's a perfect game for gaming heroes like you and me who sacrifice their precious time and money to make each gaming session better than the last. The unsung heroes who never get to play that character they've thought about for months, making him perfect for that chance to play him...only to never get to. Talisman is like D&D without a asshole DM, fuck those guys.

Yeah, I like that you don't need Big Brother to play. I also like that the Wizard is automatically Evil. Because, seriously, every wizard I have ever seen played in any D&D game has been either psychotic, or just a jerk.

Unless they're a nature wizard those guys are like hippies only nicer and smell like trees rather than B.O.

I thought nature wizards were just druids. What kind of weird DnD are you playin? Advanced 2nd Edition?

I dunno, but the druid is in Talisman too along with 13 other guys including the evil wizard. They have a really nice array of classes plus more in other EXPANSIONS! Which we'll talk about when we play them.

What was your favorite class to play? Mine was toad. You could only move one space, so you always knew where you'd wind up. And you have a pretty good chance of beating up a Druid and stealing from him. All in all, not a bad one.

Toad was cool, but druids are baby men so it's not hard to beat them up. I think my favorite man to play was the warrior. He was a cool guy. When I played him a barbarian helped him through the mountains and he got stronger! Then he was a good warrior fighting in the name of some ancient good only to be turned to the dark side and rule the world/country/board with a iron fist! That was cool, it was like living a dream...

I also enjoyed the Dwarf class. His stats are stupid high at the get-go, so he is the perfect bully character. Not to mention the fact that he can pretty much just walk to the end of the board whenever he wants.

Yeah I played him the other night with my friends. I got my ass beat by the Troll, that kind of sucked. But I valiantly sacrificed myself hoping to buy time for the other players to get to get stronger and defeat him. So they could have the fabled crown of command. Sadly my death was for not.

Yeah, I have to take back what I said earlier. Troll is the perfect bully class.

A Lemure can kick his ass though, his craft stat is probably the lowest of all characters. For people not familiar with the game, in terms of D&D craft is like Intelligence, Wisdom and Charisma all bunched in to one. You use it to fight spirits especially that fucking asshole Demon....I hate that guy.

When the demon shows up, you pretty much either call the evil Wizard (who will probably just party with it) or the creepy Priest. That Ben-Franklin looking motherfucker can kill any spirit in one hit and take no damage. Also, there's an item that does that too. So if the Troll gets said item, he's unstoppable (Except by maybe a Wizard).

Yeah like my friend Matt, he got the cross as the Troll. Just like in D&D you can get random treasure in Talisman. You move around the board drawing adventure cards, they could be awesome weapons, helpful followers, fiendish dragons or asshole imps that teleport you randomly on the board.

Another aspect of the game is the titular "Talisman". Really, the game should be called "TalismanS" becasue those things are EVERYWHERE!

Yeah really, last game a Talisman was the first card I drew. You don't even need one until late game because you have to have one to get through the space leading to the last space, the home to THE CROWN OF COMMAND!

THE CROWN OF COMMAND! The goal of the game. You can probably guess what it does. That's right! It kills people!

Yeah I don't get that part. You fight your way to get to the crown and instead of COMMANDING people you use it to hurt and eventually kill them. I mean if I had it I would make them quest for me and bring me back all of the spoils and riches.

I would make them come get me. Seriously, that crown is in a BAD NEIGHBORHOOD! Its filled with vampires and demons and werewolves and fire!

True! I guess I would use it to kill everyone though. Eventually all of the other heroes begin to get pissed and try and come kill you to take control of the crown. So I guess it makes sense.

When it's all said and done, I think Talisman is a good game and a fantastic time machine.

Yeah you and I played like seven games of it in less than twenty four hours, that's got to say something about it.

Also, each game felt like 20 minutes to me. When in reality, they were almost 2 hours each.

Yeah...we have no lives. A warning the more people that play the longer it will take. I played a game with five players and it took about four hours to play. If you have time, love fantasy games, at least one friend and about $60 to drop on a kick ass board game I definitely suggest Talisman.

And if you don't have some of that stuff, you can come play with us. Well, you can if you're cool. And like Rush.

We'll probably have more praise with in the next week or so when I get my expansion in the mail. Four more classes, new cards doubling the adventure deck, upping the spell deck and adding Death himself to the game sounds really kick ass.

I look forward to getting a few spaces away from the CROWN OF COMMAND just as you get there and kill me!

Me too and I hope our 3 fans look forward to hearing about and or playing with us!


In honor of the evil Crown of command.


EDIT: I didn't know this video had shitty word bubbles placed in to it....they piss me off. So when you listen to the song, if you do, don't watch the video.

UPDATE! No one gives a shit!

Did you catch the reference in the title? I know I did!

The costume is coming along, not counting the proton pack and trap I'm about 75% done. I just need to pick up and make a couple more things. I'm very excited to get to scratch that off the list. I'm not very excited to deal with making the proton pack....but I know once I get started it'll be a project of love rather than labor. The labor will come in when I start making three to four more of the damn things for our project. A quick update on our fan project, we've shifted from a movie to a webseries. As I'm sure I've mentioned or probably didn't, we hate fan films. Most if not everyone involved in the project has a great disdain for fan films, while many we've watched have started off strong and are quiet enjoyable by the second half they tend to lose that steam. A lot of this has to do with pacing, it begins to wind down and become nothing but a withered fart. Which isn't a good thing for a thirty minute project, if you can't keep your audience involved for more than eight minutes you've probably fucked up. So we're shifting to a five to eight minute format. Which is great for pacing and we can revolve around one or two good jokes. I went and visited Shane this last week. Aside from wasting most of our time playing Talisman (which we have decided to do a article about) we buckled down and did a character write up and have ideas for the "pilot" and first couple of episodes. But too much Talisman prevented us from actually writing a script for those. Luckily I still have two weeks off of work, that's half of my break left! I'm heading back down to be in our friend Craig's (from Witty's Ramblings) movie. That will give us more time to get the first couple of scripts hammered out...after a couple of games of Talisman. So with everything begin to piece together...kind of, we might see a spring to late spring "pilot" rather than early summer. Here's hoping Talisman doesn't fuck that up...but it proably will since I have an expansion in the mail on it's way to me, another to buy and another coming out...I'm sure they'll take up more time than before.

Wish me luck on my costume, whooping Shane's ass at Talisman, finding wave 2 of the Ghostbusters minimates and on my new diet!

Bad Idea of the Day

From a YouTube comment on a video talking about the Ghostbuster Video Game. He is refering to the fact that people have suggested the plot of the game will be translated into the 3rd Ghostbusters movie:

"I think LaBeouf would be a cool ass little Ghostbuster. He is comedic and a cool guy. He has spunk and youth. Pass him the torch as Oscar. He would be funny and have great chemistry with the Ghostbusters. For those who do'nt know who that is, it's Sam Whitwhicky from Transformers. He is an up and comming actor that we are all now comfortable with. He would bring great energy to the project. Get him in there as a reckless and funny little badass."

I'm not even really going to get into WHY I think this is a bad idea, just that I do think it is, in fact, a terribly bad idea.

Hey You!

"Watch More Wrestling..."

One of those songs I always forget about but love

Look what I made today.

They're not a 100% screen accurate, actually they're not that accurate at all. I opted for the black base of GBII rather than the green. My friend Alex and I agreed that we liked the look more. I have another elastic strap to add and some more "knobs" but other than that it's pretty much done. The little green thing on the left side is actually a small set of led lights I swiped from a Dollar Tree toy. They're really bright and didn't want them to fuck up the photos or anything so I didn't turn them on.

Yeah and if Shane's last post were real...

someone would have to call the GHOSTBUSTERS! While he's trying really hard to be a substitute teacher (loser) I'm trying to be a god damn Ghostbuster. It's been my dream since I was a child to be one, haha, as much as I know it be impossible a man can dream and dream he shall!

While that loser has been doing that, I've been looking for costume supplies and you know what I've already started! Aside from the gadgets and what not I'm pretty much done. Have my jumpsuit and boots and I have my arm patch, belt, belt clips, gloves on the way. Just need to get my name patch made and start working on the props.

On top of this Shane is working on a project with me. I also just recruited a couple more friends to work on it with us. This is something one of my good friends, Matt Hope, whipped up this morning.




















I know you're asking yourself "But aren't you already working on a Ghostbusters costume project?" and "Why does that image look like that handsome rogue Kurtis Trimbo?!" and I would answer "As much as we hate fan films here, we're starting a Ghostbusters movie!"
Shane and I have started on a script of some sorts and Matt has already started on designs. We're hoping to start initial shooting next summer. I know the idea of it being almost a year away must be quite painful for our three loyal readers! But we want to make sure we can make the best damn movie we can. A year will give us time to hammer out the script, get decent props made, make sure our sorry asses can act and have special effects higher than a cable access show. So keep an eye out for our first "movie" production! We'll obviously be posting update here.

Trials and Tribulations

You know what I want to be when I grow up? I don't know either, probably "happy" would be a good answer.

But one thing I am TRYING, is to become a substitute teacher. Thank GOD Im using a semi-alias on this blog, otherwise I doubt that'd ever happen (can you imagine searching a teacher's name and having a stupid mega man comic come up?)

So, why do I want to do this? Well, its simple. I have a magical amulet that drains youth and vitality from children. It's about 5 inches in diameter and it's shaped like a hand clutching a small skull. When the eyes of the skull glow an eerie blue, you know its working.

I guess, at the end of the day, what I want to be when I grow up is: Immortal.

So I just saw the midnight showing of District 9...

and it was fucking amazing. I also had no idea that it was a remake of a short movie that was made a few years back. Which I'm posting right here...

All I have to say is that it was a great movie, probably the best released this summer, maybe this year. I have never walked out of a theater with the crowd being so quiet. It was just an awe inspiring movie. Though they could have been quiet because it was 2am when the movie ended.

Warning:

Spooky! What have you been doing?

Oh me? I've been doing...things. I've been working more hours this summer than I have been, which has been nice. I'm also running a dungeons and dragons group at the moment, we meet once a week so a lot of my free time goes to setting up sessions for that. It was also really hot here so I was rarely on the computer, I spent most of my time in the backyard where we have a shit ton of trees, the shade was nice. I was also sick again for a week, I left town and stayed with some friends for a couple days, came home sick. The computer also fried at one point for almost two weeks. My camera cord also wont work on my computer for some reason, but will on Sara's laptop.
So it's just been one thing after another. As summer whines down so should my schedule. I'll also have close to a month off from work at the end of the month. The campus I work on closes for two weeks and then there's a optional week and half of work before classes start up again. So I'm hoping to start something soon. I've been working on some ms paint drawings and will hopefully start a comic.
I'll leave you with this though, It's when I've been listening to A LOT.

Nothing to do with Christmas

Scene opens on a random sidewalk. We see a professional looking man striding with a briefcase through what seems like a somewhat shady part of town. A confident figure steps in out from an alley and begins to speak.

"Hey, man, you want some... crack?"

"Excuse me?" The professional man replies "I don't have time for this..."

"Whoa, relax, man! It's cool, it's cool. This is good shit, my friend!"

The professional continues to rebuke the dealer's attempts. Eventually the dealer switches to the "First Taste is Free" sell tactic, though the other man still seems uninterested. Though he tries to get passed, the dealer continues to make his pitch. Finally, the professional relents.

"Fine, I'll take the damn drugs if it will get you off my back!"

"You won't regret it!"

And the professional goes along his way. After a few blocks, he stops and looks around. Not seeing the dealer, he ducks into a handy alleyway. He loosens his tie and reaches up to his face. He slowly peels off a mask, to reveal a dirty and disheveled true-face. His body language has also changed, he is now very shaky, and intent on digging the crack out of his pocket. He opens his briefcase to reveal a load of drug paraphernalia.

As he raises the lit crack-pipe to his face, he smiles to himself:

"Works every time."

Fade to black.

CiJ: Cookies

CiJ: Santa

CiJ: Masks

And this is what I think of your precious Jingle Balls